Holiday tipping: How much?
Holiday tipping. It just might be the last thing you want to think about as you stress out trying to find the perfect gift for your picky mother-in-law or your brother's girlfriend of the month.
But etiquette gurus say you can't afford to forget those people whose service you rely on all year long.
A holiday tip or gift is a thank you for yearlong service and should be treated as such. You don't want to forget your stylist and walk out of a salon in January looking like Don King. Let common sense be your guide. If the service has been good, then tip well. If it's been bad, then tip less.
Experts don't offer any hard and fast rules about how much to give the school bus driver or coaches or dance instructors or the neighbor who occasionally shovels the snow off your sidewalk.
But they do say there's a time for cash and another for a gift. If the person was doing you a favor, such as watering your plants, then a gift is more appropriate than cash, unless you're talking about teens.
Weigh your personal relationship when deciding what to give. If you talk with your child's coach at practices or share personal stories with your hairdresser, then a gift is appropriate.
But when in doubt, modern etiquette rules, surprisingly, say cash is better. Regardless, always include a "thank you" card.
Experts recommend:
Newspaper carrier: $10-$30
Mail carrier: It's against federal regulations to tip a mail carrier with cash or give him or her a gift valued at more than $20
Full-time nanny: Between one week's pay and one month's pay, depending on tenure, plus a personal gift
Sporadic baby-sitter: $25 or one evening's pay, plus a small gift from your child/children
Day-care provider: $20-$70 each, plus a small gift from your child/children
Cleaning person: $75 or up to one week's pay
Personal trainer: Up to the cost of one session
Hairdresser: $20 if you tip regularly; cost of one visit if you don't
Barber: Cost of one visit or a gift
Masseuse: Up to the cost of one session or a gift
Yard worker or gardener: $50
Garage attendants: $10-$30
Doorman: $15-$80
Pool cleaner: The cost of one pool cleaning, to be split among the entire crew
Trash collector: $20
Home health workers: A gift is preferred, but check with the agency regarding rules
Private nurse: A gift, not cash
Nursing home employees: A gift, not cash, and check with the home to see if there are any rules to follow
Dog walker: One week's pay
Pet groomer: If the same person grooms your Fido every time, then cash up to the amount of one session or a gift
Pastors: Contribute whatever amount you're comfortable with if there's a church-wide drive. If there isn't, give a gift.
Teachers: A gift from your child or cash if it's part of a class-wide collection
Source: Money Magazine, Emily Post Institute, Mannersmith Etiquette
What to weigh when determining the amount:
Quality and frequency of service: Did the person install new windows once or mow your lawn each week?
Your relationship: Do you have personal conversations? Regularly share stories about your life? Then you may want to tip more.
How much you regularly tip: If you never tip your yard worker, then gift a hefty holiday tip. If you tip well each week, then increase the tip modestly around the holidays.
Length of relationship: Has your baby-sitter worked for you for a month or five years?
Regional customs: The tip for a postal carrier in a small town may be different than in a metropolitan area.
Your budget: Don't go into debt.