In the interest of some peace, try a Disunited States of America
In this season of hope, there is none to be had.
The Elgin City Council is insulted that several thousand legal, taxpaying citizens asked them to answer a few questions about a wave of illegal immigrants. In Springfield, well-paid do-nothings are flummoxed by a goofball governor. In Iowa, candidates seem to be running for revival meeting stardom, not president of the United States.
There is no fixing this mess, no minor adjustments to be made. The only solution is the Disunited States of America, wherein the lifestyle twains never shall meet. We cannot live together and don't want to. Let's admit it and try six nation-states instead:
Sanctuary: Known locally as Nannyville, its capital would be San Francisco. Nancy Pelosi and Al Sharpton would run the show. Those living beyond the law or social norms, who need reparations, subsidies or affirmative action to survive, who define themselves as hyphenated Americans or who support any of the above would be met at the gates with a "welcome" sign. Unkind thoughts and expectations of self-reliance would be hate crimes. How it would support itself is a guess, but no one will be offended.
Sanctimony: Its capital would be somewhere in creationist Kansas, Al Gore at the helm. Religions could blow each up with impunity and punish sinners in their chosen manner -- stoning, caning, cutting off a limb here or there -- without public complaint. Here, too, are the planet savers, driving their hybrids and denying ethanol does more to drive up food prices than it saves in energy. PETA, vegans, AARP and those who know what's best for everyone else are here, too. Supported by passing the collection plate or wind generators, no doubt.
FreeBiz: Its capital could be Dallas, New York or loose-lawed Delaware, given it would be peopled by business tycoons, oil men, Wall Street sharks and frenetic financiers, who mostly make their bucks off someone else's misfortune or work. Any CEO currently in prison could serve as boss. Residents would be rolling in money, but won't be able to drink the water or breathe the air.
SmartyPants: The capital is Washington, D.C., where anything can be bought. Here would reside lawyers, scientists, college professors, paid experts and lobbyists. Tell 'em what you want and they'll deliver a personalized law, scientific study, book, lawsuit, quote or tax-funded program. Truth for sale. Too smart to need a leader.
Self-Promotion: Capital in Hollywood or Bristol, Conn., depending on whether it's football season. Here are media members who interview each other and pass it off as investigation, ex-jocks and ex-coaches who interview for future jobs on the air and pass it off as analysis, Hollywood types just out of rehab who pass as entertainers and bloggers who talk to others of exactly like mind and call it debate. A "reality" show determines the day-to-day ruler.
Gunfire: Run by Dick Cheney or Bobby Knight, probably out of Texas, this would be home to militias, the National Rifle Association, drug and mob enforcers, hunters and Blackwater troops. They'll be for hire to fight wars, keep people in or out, feed the inept, defend the pacifistic and execute society's criminals without residual societal guilt.
Pick your home. Live with your choice.
Me? I'm headed for the wilderness, where I'll be responsible for my own health and safety, can keep my money and won't have to listen to lectures on what to eat, drink, think or say. I'll find my god at the mountain top, have a smoke in his or her honor, and hire a guy from Gunfire to take care of anybody who complains.
Amid the peace, I expect hope might rise again.