Memorial services begin for Carol Stream native
The picture of Gayle Dubowski and her father at a Valentine's Day "Daddy-Daughter Dance" taken a couple of years ago was a fitting choice for her Bible's bookmark last Thursday.
And that's where her parents found it when they came to collect Gayle's Bible for her memorial services.
"It was right there where she had left it in the morning before going to classes," her mother, Laurel Dubowski, recalled tearfully Tuesday.
Gayle Dubowski never returned home from class on Valentine's Day last week. A gunman killed her and four other classmates in a crowded lecture hall at Northern Illinois University in DeKalb that day before taking his own life.
Hundreds of mourners gathered Tuesday at Salerno's Rosedale Chapel in Roselle for visitation services. A long line of friends, family, acquaintances, former teachers and others snaked slowly through the chapel and into a room filled with pastel-colored flowers. Glenbard North High School, Gayle's alma mater, will host a 7:30 p.m. memorial service today in the Carol Stream school's gymnasium. Funeral services are private.
Laurel Dubowski spent much of Tuesday morning going through her daughter's catalog of musical soundtracks to play at the memorial services.
"She sang constantly," Laurel Dubowski said. "She got up singing and she was singing until the time she went to bed."
She was active in choir programs and participated in many of her high school's musicals during her four years at Glenbard North.
"She wasn't on stage for the glory, she just liked to sing," said college friend Bethany Lager. "But she really loved musicals; we both did. She was into a lot of different kinds, but her favorites were 'Les Miserables,' 'Wicked' and 'Miss Saigon.'"
It's been nearly a week since her daughter's death and Laurel Dubowski admits it hasn't been easy dealing with the tragedy, but she's been comforted by the stories Gayle's friends from school and church have told her.
"It's been rough for us all, but I've been so encouraged to hear all the wonderful stories," she said. "Everyone's been helping in incredible ways."
Gayle is survived by her parents and a younger brother, Ryan. Laurel Dubowski said her son is handling the situation as she expected he would.
"He's a very sensitive emotional guy, so he's handling it very well; he's not holding it in," she said. "He's oftentimes comforted me when I've been crying."
The Dubowskis are members of the Chicago Church of Christ. Gayle had been active in the campus ministry at NIU at the time of her death. The Sunday service at the family's church days after the 20-year-old sophomore's passing was pretty much dedicated to her memory, church officials said.
"There's this dual sense of loss and then that she's reached the goal of her faith," said Dave Pocta, the church's youth and family minister. "There's a sense of joy because you know she's with God, but there's a deep sadness for the loss and we mourn the loss of that relationship though we know we're going to be together again some day."
Lager said she first befriended Gayle during church missionary work in Kentucky several years ago, but their friendship burgeoned when she enrolled at NIU as a freshman this year.
"We never talked about going to school together, but when I decided on Northern, she just made me feel really welcome," she said.
Lager is a music education major, and many expected Gayle to major in some type of music or education program in college. But she surprised many when she recently decided to major in anthropology.
"She had just declared her major a few weeks ago and she was really excited about it," Lager recalled. "But she didn't know what she wanted to do with it. We were just excited for her because we knew it was something she was really interested in."