A tale of two Susies

If you have HBO, and quite possibly even if you don't, you're probably familiar with the hit show "Curb Your Enthusiasm" and its expletive-slinging character Susie Greene.

Though her real-life counterpart Susie Essman agrees that she has some similarities to her alter-ego, not everything is the same.

One major difference? While speaking about her upcoming performances at Zanie's Comedy Club, nary a curse word came across the phone lines, to my surprise.

Then again, I'm sure she gets that a lot. "It's funny; a lot of people don't even know I'm a comic. A lot of people just know me as Susie Greene from 'Curb,' " says Essman of her self-created character. "She has a filthy, filthy mouth, and she has a very short fuse and is quick to anger."

Essman also points out that Greene is more analytical than she is and is more of a prude.

"Even though she has a filthy mouth, she's very conservative in a lot of ways," Essman insists.

Her favorite thing about playing her famed television character?

"When I get to yell and scream at Larry, because he enjoys it so much," Essman laughs. "Every time I yell and scream at him, he gets the giggles for maybe 10 takes. His laughter is so joyous that I love to make him laugh, and for me it's just so easy. All I have to do is start cursing at him, and he loves that. He's a masochist."

Even if you don't know Essman as her much rougher-under-the-collar counterpart, you might have seen her on the big and small screen alike. She's had parts on "Law and Order," "King of Queens," "The Tonight Show" and "Comedy Central," among others.

Before stepping onstage for the first time, she had never been inside a comedy club, but today stand-up is her favorite among performance modes.

"It's the one I have the most anxiety about and it's the hardest, but it's the most rewarding," Essman says. "Once I did stand-up, I loved it. I knew it was the thing I was supposed to do with my life."

She's come a long way from the days where she got paid $7 to do a show. "There were a lot of lean years where I lived on Campbell's Tomato Soup and saltine crackers," Essman says.

It was back in those days where she met Jon Stewart, Adam Sandler, Chris Rock and Colin Quinn.

"We were all kind of like war buddies," Essman says. "We were all doing this thing, this trench warfare together, and we were all struggling," spending hours sitting at a bar waiting to get on stage.

"You develop a tremendous bond."

As for her cool factor?

"I used to think I was cool and hip and on HBO and working nightclubs. That was until I had teenagers."

Her biggest accomplishment?

"Being a stepmother to teenagers and having them not kill me," Essman laughs.

She has two movie projects in the works. She is doing voice work for the upcoming Disney movie "Bolt," which comes out in November. She plays Mittens the cat, a tough New York stray.

"I'm co-starring with John Travolta, and we've never met. It's a very bizarre way to act. We've never been in the same room."

Before she comes to Chicago, she will also be shooting a cameo role for the movie "Marlee and Me," starring Jennifer Aniston and Owen Wilson.

Essman is appearing at Zanie's in both Vernon Hills and Chicago, this being her first time doing stand-up here. Most of her stand-up takes place in her home state of New York, as she travels a lot for her acting work.

"It just gets too much with dogs and kids and life," Essman says. "I've never played Chicago, so I'm looking forward to it."

"Don't bring the kids. It's for mature audiences only," she says. "I want people to understand that. I don't want anybody to come and get shocked. It's not filthy, disgusting dirty, but I talk about sex a lot."

Essman insists that there's a warm and fuzzy counterpart to all of this adult-content humor.

"My comedy is very edgy, very spontaneous, very real, in-the-moment and fun," she says. "I think that people leave the show with a warm feeling. People always have a lot of fun at my shows."

Susie Essman at Zanie's

Zanie's in Vernon Hills

230 Hawthorn Village Commons, (847) 549-6030

When: 8 and 9:45 p.m. March 28,

7 and 9:30 p.m. March 29

Tickets: $35 plus two-item food/beverage minimum. No coupons or discounts accepted.

Zanie's in Chicago

1548 North Wells St., (312) 337-4027

When: 8:30 p.m. March 30

Tickets: $35 plus two-item food/beverage minimum. No coupons or discounts accepted.