GOP must decide: binge or purge
It's not yet clear how the one-armed midget demographic is shaping up, but everybody seems to be bailing on the GOP.
Begging the forgiveness of one-armed midgets, I'm merely quoting Republican National Committee Chairman Michael Steele. In a Washington Times interview after being elected head of the GOP, Steele met Howard Dean's gays/guns/God challenge and raised him a jackpot of grief.
Steele was saying the GOP needed to "uptick our image with everyone, including one-armed midgets." That was February. This is now:
As state party chairmen gather this week in Maryland, a new Gallup analysis shows that since 2001, fewer people in all but one demographic (those who attend church weekly) identify as Republican.
People moving away include those who attend church nearly weekly or monthly, Midwesterners, Southerners, married people, moderates, college graduates and nongraduates.
The findings confirm growing disenchantment with a party viewed as belonging primarily to older white males, despite having selected a hip-hop-friendly African-American to lead them. Whatever the thinking, it isn't working. The party is roiling between the purgers (good riddance to anyone who thinks outside the pup tent) and the bingers (we love everybody!). Within those groups are subsets: the sane people who are not afraid of advanced degrees, and the "Billy Bobs" who think it's terribly clever to pass a resolution insisting Democrats rename their organization the "Democrat Socialist Party."
And then there's Steele.
The running joke is that Republicans have tragic where Democrats have magic. The consensus is Steele, who means well, has the wrong personality for the job.
"He's goofy and light in heavy times," as one insider put it. Many are suddenly nostalgic for "whatshisname" - the guy who ran the party before Steele, whose name no one can quite remember. Oh, yeah, Mike Duncan. At least he kept the trains running on time, they say. To which criticism Steele says, "Stuff it."
On his speaking style, the only person who can't wait to hear what Steele will say next is Joe "Bunker" Biden, who surely begins each day with a prayer: "Please, God, let Michael Steele go on TV today."
Case in point: Despite rigorous briefings on judges, Steele recently rambled off while guest-hosting Bill Bennett's radio show. Commenting on Obama's plan to appoint judges who are, among other things, empathetic to how rulings affect everyday lives, Steele managed to invoke Miss California and beauty pageant judge/blogger Perez Hilton.
Let's see: David Souter. Perez Hilton. Sure. We get that. "Let's do a little parallel," said Steele. "The empathetic judge in this case, the judge of the beauty pageant, asked this woman a question and instead of taking her answer at face value, he was empathetic to a particular community and he thought her answer should be favorably disposed toward that particular community." If you get Steele's drift, you may want to grab a flotation device.
Helping Steele in his self-demolition are power brothers Curt and Wes Anderson, media consultant and pollster, respectively. All one needs to know is that Curt was the magician behind Louisiana Gov. Bobby Jindal's perky performance following Obama's February address to Congress.
Finally, insiders feel the GOP should have won the New York special election to replace Kirsten E. Gillibrand, the Democrat who succeeded Hillary Clinton in the Senate. And internal polling showed the contest, lost by just 700 votes, was winnable. Although Steele directed some money to New York, his critics say it wasn't spent strategically enough to draw soft Republicans - the GOP's real target demographic.
Even the most empathetic judge perusing Steele's record would be forced to wonder: What's up with that?
© 2009, Washington Post Writers Group