Author says young women need to give up trying to be perfect

Liz Funk says it's time for "Supergirls" to speak out.

The 21-year-old New York-based writer says too many young women are buried under the weight of self-perfectionism and are paying the price.

"They just can't rely on being pretty anymore. Now they have to be smart, accomplished, people-pleasing, well-spoken, ambitious and charming," she said. "Many are secretly struggling with the intense pressure to be perfect."

Kicking off the College of Lake County's new Gender and Sexuality Studies program, Funk spoke to about 60 students Wednesday afternoon. The program begins this fall.

The author of "Supergirls Speak Out: Inside the Secret Crisis of Overachieving Girls," Funk talked for nearly an hour about the dangers girls face as they strive to become perfect.

The negative effects of that inner tension can show up in mental breakdowns, eating disorders, suicide and alcohol abuse, among other emotional ills.

"Overachieving young woman are stressed out and think drinking can take the edge off," Funk said. "But I don't think they are just drinking for stress relief. Many supergirls drink in excess to show men that they are not threatening and not as smart in order to appear more attractive. Are we still grappling the outdated notion that men are afraid of powerful women? Unfortunately, maybe."

In researching the book, Funk followed five girls, ranging in age from 15-27, and interviewed nearly 100 other girls, psychologists, high school teachers, college professors and experts on women's issues, a CLC spokesman said. The book was published in 2009.

Funk offered suggestions to girls who want to get off the perfection treadmill.

She said girls need to scale back on social media and reclaim time to be alone with their thoughts. She suggested taking an entire day or two to unplug from e-mail, texting and homework.

"It's possible to never be alone with your thoughts," Funk said. The proliferation of technology is preventing young people from having solitary time and getting to know themselves. They can't be self-aware."

That notion resonated with student Shahar Nikanjam of Highland Park.

"I know what it's like to conform as a supergirl," she said. "And she was dead-on right with a lot of her points. I like the idea of alone time. I've come to love knitting instead of just going out and partying all the time. Having a hobby is huge."