As an NFL commentator, Fox’s Tom Brady doesn’t add much in the way of color

Those of us who watch NFL football with the sound off may yet have an opinion about the broadcasting chops of Tom Brady because, after all, he is Tom Brady.

The Greatest of All Time has been reviewed rather harshly early in his new career, and had I not accidentally left the volume up on the Bears-Packers game, I would have no idea how awful he is.

Brady has the thin voice of an adolescent, and the syntax as well, while he will run on and on trying to catch up with his first unoriginal thought. Some might call that sort of wandering a “weave,” very marketable these days.

He strays from the obvious to the pointless, not unusual among “color commentators,” a profession invented to fill the gap between plays. Observations, opinions and insights are basic requirements, not unlike that for the sports columnist, but better paid.

For Brady the actual amount of pay for his muddling is $370 million, assuming he lasts 10 years. Fox usually pays that much money for folks to leave their network rather than to join it.

Brady was much too famous to ever be allowed to slip quietly into the faceless fraternity, which is why his face is shown whenever possible, a nice face, scarless and photogenic.

He will be over-reviewed until Brady's fame fades as it will. No longer the definer of things, his influence will become just another piece of the pile. No one will accuse him of cursing Cairo Santos by pointing out what everyone already knows, place kicks can be blocked.

Maybe too much was expected from Brady, yet a playing career of public blandness ought to have been a clue. When he criticizes the Bears for mishandling Caleb Williams, not allowing Williams to learn behind a veteran, he could be talking about himself.

Here’s the job. Here’s the check. Now, be great.

Other cultures get along fine without in-game commentary and even the play-by-play guy will strain to voice a quiet “Oh, my,” at the unusual. Not counting soccer, of course. The point is, perspective does not necessarily come at the top of the voice.

For those of us who remember Joe Namath in that motorcycle movie or Michael Jordan with Bugs Bunny, we recognize that athletic gifts do not change lanes easily, but examples do exist, notably Greg Olsen, whose job Brady took, though Olsen was natural and incisive. Tony Romo, too, is better in the booth than he was on the field.

Great athletes tend not to be great communicators. The most surprising example may be John McEnroe. A surly punk as a player, he is now a must listen in tennis, a sport that needs all the juice it can find.

Bob Uecker alone is enough for any baseball game, as was Vin Scully or Harry Caray, with a partner or without.

Golf misses Johnny Miller and whatever awaits Tiger Woods, it is doubtful he will become the voice of golf, although, as with Brady, an audience awaits the tales he could tell.

Charles Barkley is a great jock who has exceeded his fame as a player, but basketball has never been done better than Doug Collins at courtside, commenting, not coaching.

For reasons unclear Terry Bradshaw has become a brand, his big lug persona replacing what was a remarkable playing career. Cris Collinsworth may be the best of the current ex-jock game enhancers, a spot earned, not awarded.

Locally, no one is better than Steve Stone, the only reason I leave the sound up on Sox games.

It is not that Brady has big shoes to fill, there being no John Madden to set the bar any more. But he could become Troy Aikman, a slow starter, too, who has grown into competence.

One more thought, and not unhappily, is for the University of Michigan, which, as far as I know, gave Brady a degree without asking him if he could conjugate a verb.

Not that he was required to do anything academic while, as I remember it, being unable to start ahead of Brian Griese on the football field, but things did turn out OK for Brady over the years.

Excuse me, it’s game time. I have to turn the sound off. Where is that remote?