O’Donnell: What if they threw a Bears game and nobody came?
THERE IS A NASTY LITTLE STIGMA that whizzes around people who deign to purchase season tickets from the Chicago Bears.
Not all friends, neighbors and professional associates think, “Wow, eight or nine times each season, they get to go to games at Soldier Field.”
Instead, an enveloping perspective is: “Why would any rational human being put up with the cost, time and assorted types of discomfort that go with essentially being necessary backdrop props for a historically disappointing sports show business company?”
Especially when all games are on some kind of home TV — near all the important accessories, including DVR remote, microwave and private indoor plumbing.
BUT WORDS AND PHRASES SUCH AS pliable, paw-struck and “pastime challenged” are so impolitic.
There has been a recurring thought since the Bears departed Wrigley Field after Jim Dooley's 1969 bottom feeders finished 1-13.
And certainly since visiting Giants punter Sean Landeta fanned on a punt in his own end zone while the lakefront wind chill hovered around minus-3 degrees. That flub came in a 21-0 divisional-round rout by the Super Bowl XX-bound Bears of Mike Ditka in January 1986.
Frostbite fallen who attended that landmark freeze-out were pitied, not envied.
AND THE BIG THOUGHT IS:
What if the Bears put on a home game and nobody came?
What if a dog-ola outfit like the 2024 castaways drew an attendance of 0?
Just once.
It would take an astoundingly righteous fervor in a metro drawing area of eight million-plus for that to happen.
And probably some bearded man with staff in hand to lead and to part an Orange Sea.
BUT A MEDFLY CAN DREAM, especially after George McCaskey and arrogant armada announced their thoroughly gratuitous 10 percent average hike in prices for 2025 Thursday.
The current Bears are an organization upstreaming on the football ops side and thoroughly bereft of shovel-turning, inspired leadership.
They have as much right to raise season-ticket prices for the upcoming NFL season as Delta Air Lines does to charge carry-off baggage fees at the Toronto airport.
But whoops, there it is.
SEASON-TICKET BUYERS of consistently underperforming NFL teams will never understand:
The league needs them much more than fans need bad, in-person NFL football.
Empty seats look so unseemly on network TV. In a perfect world, the day will come when an outfit like the Bears need to contract with a ready-temp agency like Sorta Fans to fill their pathetic playpen.
But for now, the pliable, paw-struck and pastime challenged will pay on.
And those nearby will hold all snickers at the nasty little stigma.
STREET-BEATIN':
While segments of sports media continue to throw word confetti at the NHL's 4 Nations Face-Off, here's a reality check: A tricked-up midseason gimmick produced a nicely theatrical finish. The endeavor further devalued all legacied major All-Star games. Connor McDavid and fellow slammers also looked like Penn and Teller against the boring buffoonery that Adam Silver and the NBA tried to pawn off as an All-Star weekend. …
The arrival of Justin Turner — age 40 — at Cubs spring training camp is quite a tell about where Jed Hoyer is looking to strengthen the 2025 Wigglies. There must be something about directing a MLB team in Chicago that means never having to overstep budget. …
The recent move of Chuck Goudie from WLS-Channel 7 to WMAQ-Channel 5 News will only enliven the local sports back channels if his investigative instincts land there. There are recurring indications that the bulldogged Goudie has circled the bona fides of one intriguing mover for further review. (Goudie is also a past contributor to the Daily Herald.) …
For people who recall the 2002 Breeders Cup Classic at Arlington Park, Volponi, 27, died this week. The P.G. Johnson runner upset a stellar field with a win price of $89 on that gray October afternoon. More important, his long shot victory helped to expose the “Fix Six” almost successfully pulled off by three former Drexel University I.T. sharpies. (Billy, Harry and Danny Teinowitz were honestly all over the colt days in advance; father Phil Teinowitz owned Cryptoclearance, Volponi's sire.) …
And Scott Thomson, on ESPN's decision to ditch all Major League Baseball game programming after the upcoming campaign: “Who's going to notice?”
Jim O'Donnell's Sports and Media column appears each week on Sunday and Wednesday. Reach him at jimodonnelldh@yahoo.com. All communications may be considered for publication.