Now Chicago's richest geezers can ride the bus for free
"My expectation is that the legislature will approve the governor's proposal for free transit rides for millionaires who happen to be over 65."
So said Illinois House Speaker Michael Madigan, a Chicago Democrat who is among the 65-year-old millionaires who will be able to ride the buses and trains for free once the governor's transit bailout passes.
After Gov. Rod Blagojevich reneged on his pledge to never raise sales taxes to fix the CTA, he justified raising sales taxes by throwing out a bone.
"The General Assembly sent me a pile of horse manure to solve the CTA," said Blagojevich after pulling this one from the seat of his britches, "and I see a pony in that by giving every senior citizen a free ride on buses and subway trains."
Other than Madigan, there are indeed some very needy seniors who will be eligible for free rides.
Among them will be the governor's 69-year old father-in-law, Chicago Alderman Richard Mell, who would be able to take public transit to the Blagojevich family dinners if their feud ever ends and he is invited back.
State Senate President Emil Jones, a 71-year-old Chicago Democrat, will be able to hitch a free ride, as will Secretary of State Jesse White, 73. And you can bet that Cook County Assessor James Houlihan and powerful Chicago Alderman Edward M. Burke can hardly wait for their 65th birthdays this year.
Just think, Mayor Richard M. Daley, already 65, also will be able to give up his chauffeured city cars and save the taxpayers hundreds of thousands of dollars in gas, maintenance and police/driver overtime by taking city buses and the el to O'Hare and Midway.
Some of the mayor's top associates and friends also will get free rides, including city Commissioner of Cultural Affairs Lois Weisberg, 82; Olympic committee boss Patrick Ryan, 70; real estate magnates Elzie Higginbottom, 65, and Nicholas Gouletas, 69; world famous architect Helmut Jahn, 67; industrialist and race track owner Richard Duchossois, 85; lawyer Phil Corboy, 83, and Marshall Field V, 66.
Of course, there are some that the mayor and governor would prefer not to see by way of free public transportation or any other means of getting to city hall or the state office building. The persona non grata would include: clout artiste and disbarred lawyer Oscar D'Angelo, 75, and aging members of the infamous Duff trucking family.
Among the Duffs who perfected free rides decades ago by donating millions to politicians are John F. Duff Jr., 82, who also once testified as a character witness for Chicago mob boss Anthony "Big Tuna" Accardo and his wife Patricia, 79, who was accused of being the figurehead for her son's company in order to land city contracts reserved for women vendors.
You also might find yourself sitting next to one of these senior freeloaders on a bus or the subway: John "No Nose" Difronzo, who turns 80 this year but is still the day-to-day boss of the Chicago Outfit according to mob investigators; and Alphonse "Pizza Al" Tournabene, 84, said to be the mob's consigliere.
Others relegated to the status of senior transit disadvantaged are: Ernie Banks, 76; Mike Ditka, 68; former Gov. Jim Thompson, 71; World Trade Center Chicago CEO Neil Hartigan, 69; make-up mogul Marilyn Miglin, 68; Bulls and White Sox owner Jerry Reinsdorf, 71; Northwestern University president Henry Bienen, 68; the Rev. Jesse L. Jackson Sr., 65; Lettuce Entertain You restaurants founder Rich Melman, 65, and former anchorman Bill Kurtis, 66.
Taxpayers and younger riders will be financing free rides for seniors through a hike in the sales tax and higher fares. It is not just the notable and notorious seniors who will be eligible. Some of the wealthiest citizens in the history of Chicago will be able to ride for free.
Lester Crown, 82, is worth about $4 billion and he'll be able to hop on a bus for nothing. And Sam Zell, 65, who just bought the Tribune companies, has a net worth of about $6.5 billion. Maybe Mr. Zell will need a free lift to Wrigley Field in the spring.
This isn't the first time a light bulb has suddenly gone on over the governor's head. He frequently dispenses state money during speeches to interest groups just to surprise them.
But such good politics is not necessarily good public policy. What about all the other people in Illinois who could use free rides? What about struggling single moms, dads who actually pay child support; minority teens who want to work but can't find jobs; parolees who have doors slammed on them; the young and the homeless … where is their ticket?